i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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