white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
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