this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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