Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
