She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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