I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
