Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
