i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
