there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Randomize
