Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Randomize
