Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
