Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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