she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
