I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
my shit smells like andre
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
