I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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