I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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