Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
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You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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