i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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