I want to walk on stilts...naked
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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