your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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