I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I just googled if crying burns calories
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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