We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
