I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Blood and glitter go together right?
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize