Quick, to the slutcave!
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
