i love accidental penises.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Drunk is not a location!
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
