I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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