she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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