Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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