Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
