oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Randomize