I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
