He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
So gin and wine won't be happening again
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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