apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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