from now on my penis is your penis
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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