I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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