Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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