You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
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