I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
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