sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
They are going to name an STD after you.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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