You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
