Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Randomize