Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
My balls are so social today.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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