to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
