Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Randomize
