Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize