I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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