Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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