She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
