Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
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