The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
