Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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